The Plan, or How Shite Happens– Anonymous
(Sent to me several years ago, and just re-found while going through my stack of stuff.)
(Deep and prescient on more than one label)
In the beginning was the Plan.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the Assumptions were without form.
And darkness was upon the face of the Workers.
And they spoke among themselves, saying, “It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh.”
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and said, “It is a pail of dung, and none may abide the odour thereof.”
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, “It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it.”
And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, “It is a vessel of fertiliser, and none may abide its strength.”
And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another, “It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong.”
And the Directors then went onto the Vice Presidents, saying unto them, “It promotes growth and is very powerful.”
And the Vice Presidents went unto the President, saying unto him, “This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company; with powerful effects.”
And the President looked upon the Plan, and saw that it was good.
And the Plan became Policy.
This is How Shit Happens.